Benjamin Zander: Classical Music with Shining Eyes

I never stated this anywhere around my blogs before, but anyone who knows me personally would know this: I am a piano player. Not that I play piano for living but I play piano since I was like 5 or 6 years old. I play classical music. I was never really fond of it. It doesn’t mean I hate classical music, I don’t. I even enjoy classical music at some point or another. Well, recently, I wasn’t at that point. I wasn’t into piano. But just now, my sister came into my room and gave me a video to watch.

Benjamin Sandler. I am so fascinated, looking at this video. I am not going to put it from the musician perspectives. I am not going to take the music lesson here, now. What fascinates me most is the fact that he knows who he is and what he is going to do: to find the shining eyes. I am 19, going 20. The truth is I never really know what I am capable of. I don’t have one, particular, very special talent or characteristic. I even wonder what my job is in this world. Am I loving? Am I patient? Am I a good writer? Or maybe a good musician? Or will I be a good accountant? What am I going to do with my whole life? Am I an artist?

Looking at him in this video makes me realize that this is the person who knows what he is doing, that this is the example if you are doing what you are truly made for and capable of. I told myself: Jill, you see that man in the video? You’ve got to be one like him: who knows what you’re doing and what you’re capable of; who knows what you’re going to do with your life and your world.

And I think I’d like to share it here, in case there are people who are on the same page as I am now. I hope, also for myself, that we are going to go through this soon, and discover our personal legend in the right time.

PS: if you are curious about what ‘personal legend’ is, you should read The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. A really great book.

Cheers,

Jill Bobby

Inside- Out

(Approximate reading time: 5-7 minutes, around 700 words)

I remember how often I had conversations regarding to characters of people. I don’t really know that much, just basic things such as introvert- extrovert: phlegmatic, melancholic, choleric, and sanguine.

Here’s a brief explanation about these four before I go on:

· Introvert: the ones who love to be with themselves, not too sociable but they are more comfortable with small groups. The introverts got their energy by enjoying their own time. Then, the introverts could be divided into two other types:

o Phlegmatic: the ones who care less about things, insensitive

o Melancholic: the ones who keep things to themselves, usually think too much and very sensitive

· Extrovert: the ones who love to be with others, very sociable. They get their energy by socializing and they love to be in the crowd. It could be divided into two other types:

o Choleric: the leaders, anyone who love to lead and organize things.

o Sanguine: the center of attention, the jokers. They talk more and usually very cheerful.

Human usually do not only have one particular type, like purely phlegmatic, or purely melancholic. We have these mixtures between all of these types. For instance we could be more to extrovert, but there are times when we would like to be alone, right? Vice versa. It’s just the matter of more of which.

Me? Oh, I am more into introvert. I keep things to myself, and to my observances, introvert people love to write. We usually don’t talk much to others but we keep the conversation and thoughts to ourselves. So I ran a test in my high school, and the result is I am (1) phlegmatic, (2) choleric, and (3) melancholic. It occurs that these three are really tight that they only differed by one point each. However, one thing for sure: I am not sanguine.

I remember that once in few years ago, I had a conversation with one friend. He is rather melancholic, I could tell, and maybe choleric (I am not really sure about the second one). Anyway, he is a melancholic that I could sense it in that conversation. It was so nice talking to him because he actually had so much in mind. So I told my other friends that he was so melancholic and so sensitive and had such a lot of things on his head. I never meant to put that into some kind of disrespect or something. Never. However, my friends laughed and I was so confused why, but (blame on me) I never asked them why and never really fixed things up. Yet after that time, I never really spoke to him again. Maybe it was because he heard what I told my friends about him and he felt humiliated, I don’t know.

So here’s the thing: I don’t think that one type is better than another. I don’t think that being a sanguine, the center of the attention, the cheerful one, is better than being a melancholic. No, I don’t mean that. I adore melancholic people, as I adore choleric, phlegmatic, and sanguine people. I read several great books that I believe the authors are melancholic, such as Paulo Coelho and Mitch Albom. They wrote amazingly and stunningly because they think about life deeply. I adore the choleric as they have their natural leaders inside, also with phlegmatic and sanguine, with their own uniqueness.

The second thing I would like to emphasize is that the essence of each type would change over time, along with our circumstances and how we grow along with them. When I was small, I was so choleric. I was the leader of the class and many organizations. However, it changed over time. When I was high school, I was rather melancholic, but still choleric. And honestly, I hated myself for that. I thought, “Ah, it would be so nice if I could be sanguine. Everyone would love me and I could befriend with everyone.” And as I grow up, now I am more to be phlegmatic, choleric and melancholic. The difference is now that I appreciate each of the character and their own uniqueness, I appreciate myself more, and as I appreciate myself more, I could learn how to increase my own value. For example, I am not sanguine, but I could learn how to be one cheerful and nice person toward others, without really changing my own uniqueness. By being a choleric I could lead. By being a melancholic, I could write blogs and be a listener. By being a phlegmatic I could me all of the above as I wish, without worrying about what people think.

And lastly, I am totally agreed with the saying: ‘The more we understand ourselves, the more we understand others.’ As I understand myself, I could understand people. I could respect people when they are quite, as when they are cheerful. I could respect my friends when they talk more, as they talk less; as they read books or as they tell stories.

Many times, I give my friends advice: love yourself, if you can’t love yourself, change things you cannot love. If you cannot change them, love them, because it is the only thing you could do.

With love and hugs,

Jill Bobby

Merry Christmas, Comrades!!!

I know its late. I know this December 26 and it's pretty late already, but I still want to say Merry Christmas to all of you who have stopped by my blog and probably have been reading my blog for I-don't-know-how long.

And here's my big, fat, beardy Santa, wishing you a perfect holiday and wonderful Christmas.

PS: This it not my Santa. Thanks to Google that I could find one.

With love as my Christmas presents for all of you,

Jill Bobby

2012 Wish List/ Resolutions

Okay so here’s my wish list or you may call it resolutions for 2012. I haven’t really thought about them right now, so here are the first 10 lists. It might be added next time.

1. I want to have better GPA

Why I put it on the very first list? I don’t know. I am actually not that kind of ambitious person. I put littlest care about scores or GPA, but when I typed this down, the first thing came into my mind was this. So here it is, on the very first list. This includes to pay attention to class (which is very, very hard since I feel sleepy all the time at campus), do all the homework, and attend all classes.

2. I want to blog more

I know, right? I blog seasonally and think I better put up my mind when to blog and discipline myself through it. The reasons are well, firstly I love writing; secondly, writing keeps my English in place (and I hope, better); thirdly, it keeps me thinking critically; and lastly, it keeps my soul alive, I don’t know how.

3. I need to read more

I love reading books, but for your information, I read SLOWLY. I can read one book for three months, unless I am forced to read that. Or worse, I can leave the book half finished even though I know the book is great. I once read a novel by Haruki Murakami titled “Kafka on the Shore”. I was so intense reading the first half of the book but then I leave it and even forget about it so then I asked my sister about the ending. I also read this Indonesian literature called Bumi Manusia, which is also left ¾ finished for almost one year now. I think I should stop reading new novel references and start reading the ones I have in my room.

4. I want to keep my devotions alive

Actually in these two months I’ve been stopping my devotions and Morning Prayer. Bad, I know. But I just couldn’t feel anything right now. I’ll talk about this later in my other blog.

5. I wish I could have my holiday abroad

I want to go once again to Hong Kong; or maybe for 2012, I wish I could go to South Korea. I want to take a lot of pictures, walk around the streets with languages I don’t understand, and watch how others live, which have totally different lives but with the same hair and skin color. It’s just interesting, isn’t it?

6. I want to play hard and study hard, also sleep more.

About this one, I have completely no idea how. I just wish I could.

7. I want to give more well-prepared presents

This Christmas I gave presents to people that I owe so much in 2011: family, boyfriend and friends. I didn’t prepare that much that I could not give them proper presents. I would really like to give them something better next year. But again, I’m not good at finding presents. I could spend the whole probably two weeks to really find something achievable and rather nice presents. So yeah, maybe next time will be far better

8. I want to increase my soft skills

Truth be told, I might look talkative in my blogs, twitter or tumblr, but I’m that good in socializing, in the real world I mean. I am more of introvert and I love being with my own self. However, recalling that I am really stepping into one to another world, I should really start practicing my speech and smile.

9. I want to increase my piano skill

Well, about this, just this.

10. I need to be a better daughter, sister, girlfriend and friend

Honestly I don’t really put that much effort to role as stated above. I need to work it out more next year.

Life Updated- December 2011

I think lately is the longest and, at the same time, shortest two weeks ever. It was so hectic at campus, tons of work and assignments, quizzes and exams, and at the same time I have to balance my time with another personal things to settle. Gladly I am still alive. Phew~

Today is December 23, two days before Christmas. Well, it’s actually 11.30 PM when I write this entry, so technically, Christmas is only about 25 hours ahead. Unlike years before, I spend these days without walking around in the malls with Christmas tree, or being one busy body around the church all day long weeks before. It felt so…strange.

Anyway, I really am thinking of putting my New Year wish list and resolutions BEFORE New Year, but next week is last week of 2011 and I still have a bunch of things to do, especially I have tons of work from my beloved lectures. Wish me luck, guys. See you later

Love,

Jill Bobby

Precious

This post is regarding to the suicidal tendencies stated on the news recently:

When I had an accident last July, I was wounded quite badly. I had my knees and hands bruised and my front tooth cracked. It was different from the one happened on my last blog. This was two months before.

So I got home with my dad, bruised here and there. When I got home, my mom cried. I didn’t cry at all. It was hurt, but it was okay. I sat on the chair in my living room, when my sister came with along with water and else, suddenly she hugged me, and she cried her eyes out while saying, “Thank God you’re okay. Thank God you’re still alive.” I nearly cried. My mom and my sister cried in my place. I never knew I was that precious until I saw them cried that badly.

Then I realized: human are designed particularly that way to live side by side, connected to each other. No matter how we live in this world, our lives intersect with others’, and that’s when we should realize that our lives are not only ours anymore. Our lives are others’ too. Our lives are theirs, too. There would at least be one person, crying for our sake when we are gone; that everyone is precious.

Love and hug

Jill Bobby

Life Updated

I haven’t been blogging in almost 3 months. And still today, I don’t know what to write. I have lists of topics in my phone’s memo, yet I looked at it, and still don’t know what to write. But I miss writing. I miss painting in words. That’s how I end up writing this blog.

It might be better if I put it as ‘updating life’.

So, currently, everything happened. I started third semester three months ago, which contains of 23 SCU (part of my reasons why I stopped blogging for a while); I had motorbike accident (also part of my lame reason why I stopped blogging); and lastly, I finally decided to have my life accompanied by someone (which is also keeping me occupied these days).

First, I started third semester, and the schedule sucks. I got a whole day at campus, from early morning till late. I got these morning and night classes, and in the middle, I had 5 hours break. I couldn’t go home, so I had my long, long break at campus. It keeps me half alive.

Secondly, for those of you who don’t know yet, because of the traffic I decided to go to campus by motorbike. No, I don’t drive; my dad drives me to campus everyday. Late September, I had a motorbike accident. It wasn’t really ‘accident’. But, well, I fell off the bike.

So here’s the story: I was on my way to campus, when another motorbike drove pass me and snatched my bag. My campus bag. Yes, it was snatched. I put the bag in front of me (in the middle of me and my dad), and it was snatched, just like that. No, I didn’t fall because of that. The snatchers didn’t harm me. But I was so freaked out and I screamed and I told my dad to go after them (it was two of them). My bag had everything precious you could name

them: my phone, my iPod, my wallet (ID card, Student ID, credit card, debit card, EVERYTHING), and a LOT of things. So my dad

and I went after them, and I screamed (yes, I literally screamed). When finally we got near the snatchers, they won’t

stop, they kept going, so my dad drove our motorbike toward them, and bang! Four of us fell. Long story short, I got my bag back, along with the bruises.

This one was right after the accident

This is tonight. Still have some scars, aye? =(

Yet thank God my dad and I are okay, despite of any scars remain.

Anyway, for the last one, I think I better keep it for another post for another time. =p

That’s all for today

Love,

Jill Bobby

Five Important Lessons of How to Treat People

1. First Important Lesson - “Know The Cleaning Lady”

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: “What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?

Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

“Absolutely,” said the professor. “In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say “hello.”

I’ve never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.


2. Second Important Lesson - “Pickup In The Rain”

One night, at 11:30 p.m., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car.

A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab.

She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man’s door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home.

A special note was attached. It read: “Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband’s bedside just before he passed away. God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others.”

Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.


3. Third Important Lesson - “Remember Those Who Serve”

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10 year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him. “How much is an ice cream sundae?” he asked. “50¢,” replied the waitress.

The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it.

“Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?” he inquired. By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient. “35¢!” she brusquely replied.

The little boy again counted his coins. “I’ll have the plain ice cream,” he said. The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left.

When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies. You see, he couldn’t have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.


4. Fourth Important Lesson - “The Obstacles In Our Path”

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king’s wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand - “Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.”


5. Fifth Important Lesson - “Giving When It Counts”

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare and serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year-old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, “Yes, I’ll do it if it will save her.”

As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheeks. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, “Will I start to die right away?”.

Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.

Source: http://www.globalone.tv/profiles/blogs/how-to-treat-others-5-lessons

Timeliness

Gw tiba-tiba keinget ya, beberapa tahun lalu waktu gw masih getol2nya dengerin radio, malem2 tuh penyiar radionya nanya: umur relationship itu ngaruh nggak sih? Apa lu tipe orang yg bakal mempertahankan suatu relationship (pacaran) hanya gara2 ‘sayang banget udah berapa tahun’ atau nggak. Terus ya, setelah itu gw lupa apa pembahasannya. Cuman inget pertanyaannya doang.

Then, I start to question it recently since a lot of things happened. Tapi menurut gw it’s silly to hold onto a relationship just because its length. Iya nggak sih? I think, people tend to hold onto a bad relationship because of its length, because some people are too afraid to be alone. Temen2 gw, (lagi2), belakangan ini nanya: “Jill, gw udah pacaran sekian taun, kok dia nggak ada hati gitu sih. Jadi sekian taun gw pacaran ke mana kenangan2 kita?” iya, lagi2 jawaban gw cuman: “Gw nggak tau.”

“Tapi,” kata gw, “Ya lu mau 1 bulan pacaran atau 10 tahun, kalau orangnya ternyata bersifat buruk begini, ya lu mau ngapain? Kalau udah 10 tahun, then you wanna hold onto it? Gw nggak tau sih gimana kalau lu. Tapi menurut gw, itu udah nggak bisa diterima. Jadi ya, daripada lu married sama orang kayak gitu?” Nah, biasanya abis gw ngomong gini ke orang2, mereka langsung lega. Langsung berasa kuat dan keren dan pengen nyari orang yg lebih baik. Tapi biasanya lagi, jam 12 malem mereka hubungin gw lagi. Galau.

Terus gw pernah ditanya lagi satu pertanyaan: “Jill, lu gimana caranya move on dan bisa membuka pintu lain dengan cepat?” hmm… kayaknya nggak cepet deh. Mungkin cepet menurut mereka, tapi perjuangannya juga mati2an. Tapi menurut gw sih, hold on to a good relationship. Let go bad relationship. Let go, bener2 let go. Find what’s best for you. Who makes you happy and better person. No matter how long the relationships are, let it go kalau itu put bad impact. It doesn’t count the length of the relationships. I think all of us deserve the best. But to open a new door, you should really shut the door. And when you already shut that damn door, a new way will find you better life, supposedly. Well it works for me. “Yang penting bukan tegas sama orang itu tapi tegas sama diri sendiri” –my friend.

Gw mudah gitu ya keliatannya ngmg gini, but you’ll never know how much effort I put into life and get the lessons. Yet it is worth the fight. I never know if the solutions I put either on my blogs or the ones I told my friends really work for everyone. But you could just ambil sedikit dari apa yang gw tulis dan dimodif sana sini, then you’ll find your way. Atau mungkin lu bisa get your own solutions, atau apply my solutions as a whole.

Love,

Jill Bobby

First Week

This is the first week of my second year in university. Well, kesannya: CAPE. Biar gw jelaskan jadwal kampus gw briefly. Dari Selasa sampe Jumat, gw pulang kuliah paling cepet tuh 0530 PM; paling malem adalah jam 0830 PM. Mulainya, 2 hari dimulai dari pukul 0730 AM, 2 hari lagi dimulai pukul 1130 PM. Hari Senin aja yang gw berangkat siang dan pulang sore. Selebihnya, malem.

However, strange enough, I found that this week has been more interesting than I have ever imagined before. Mungkin karena baru masuk dari liburan 3 bulan, jadi gw agak semangat mulai kuliah. Well, let’s see sampe kapan gw semangat. Dosen2nya juga lebih mending daripada semester 2, walau jadwal kuliahnya berantakan. Dan doakan saya, semoga saya tetap bersemangat sampai final exam nanti.

Buat kalian2 yang kuliah, kerja atau sekolah, atau mungkin nganggur,

Cemungudthh eaaaa qaqa2 cemuaahhh

XO,

Jill Bobby